Further Adventures

...from my every day life.  And I have so many thoughts.

• Last Thursday we went to Costco for bread and milk.  I like those from Costco for several reasons.  Opened up the car door this morning and there was the bread we bought, still in the car after four days.  Sheesh.  I try to always be prepared and sort of plan ahead so I am ready for the hiccups that always seem to happen. But it isn't always a good thing.  So, we didn't absolutely need that bread (and it usually goes straight in the freezer to lengthen its life because we only use a couple slices a day).  But seriously?  I remember reminding myself to not leave it in the car, though I did it anyway. 

• Saturday night we had a fierce storm.  Actually it's still wending its way through the area.  Was so happy to know I could turn on the fireplace.  Looked over and yup, the pilot light was out. Sent the company an email requesting service, they wanted to come on Sunday morning (nope, we're at church) so the time was set for yesterday afternoon.  It kept getting bumped, but finally Tyler arrived.  He got the pilot light lit, we ran the fireplace for a couple hours, then The Husband went out the back door and when he came in and shut the door the pilot light went out.  😔 Tyler had me take a video of how to re-light it but right now I just can't.  

• And since it's about 66 degrees in the house, the furnaces are now running.  They kicked on almost instantaneously so it's obviously cold in here.  I don't want it too cold for the kitty.  Last week it was so warm I succumbed and turned on the air conditioning.  And now it's the furnaces.  The bank account will take more of a hit for our in-house comfort, but I keep telling myself we're worth it.

Found Online- Totally agree

• Skipped our walk this morning to be ready for The Husband's anticipated haircut.  Tried a new place.  Don't think The Husband has had such a good haircut in years and years.  We'll be return clients for sure.  She was so pleasant. 

• Since we were over that way we wandered into Kohl's.  I've been wanting (hesitate to call it a need) something new to wear.  Decided to try on the cute sweater before purchasing.  Good thing I did, it was a hard no.  I'm just too old, too frumpy/fat and too all around unattractive.  Which is disheartening.  (Great word that, right?)

• Also because we were over there, stopped in at Great Harvest for a loaf of bread and some of their yummy cookies - they taste homemade.  I keep these in the freezer, pull one out occasionally for us to share, they warm up nicely in the microwave.  She signed me up for the rewards - I generally avoid that kind of thing - and "because you're so adorable I'll give you extra points".  Told her I hadn't been called adorable in ages and she good-humoredly chided The Husband for slacking.  Too cute.  Made me smile on a dismal morning. 

• Was gifted some cash to spend on a purse - I'm always looking for a good one and mostly everything falls short somehow.  Finally decided that the money was a gift and gifts are for luxuries not for practicality so I ordered a bag.  My typical winter color (black) felt so boring I chose the cobalt blue - a luxury, right? Looking forward to its arrival.

• Mid October and it finally feels like fall.  The trees are starting to lose their leaves.

• David came to do the fall lawn fertilization.  He's yet to see me dressed and with my hair done, he always comes first thing in the morning.  I love that he rings the doorbell, has a little chat, imparts whatever pertinent info he has to give and goes about his work. This company is why I like to shop local, they really care about doing a great job.  I recommend this company to pretty much everyone given the chance.

• I am continually repenting.  Every day there's a reason for me to apologize - most often to The Husband for responding poorly.  He deserves only good from me.  It's really sad that I behave unkindly.  It makes me ashamed.  And determined to better and often I do, for a while.  Hopefully Heavenly Father doesn't give up on me because I'm so slow to conquer my weakness.

Today I am so grateful for the working furnaces and the ability to keep the house warm.  Sweaters are good and an integral part of our fall/winter wardrobe.  But warmth is good also.  (I had to get up overnight before we turned on the furnaces and get a blanket because I was cold.  Typical fall hot/cold weather.)  I'm grateful for repentance.  Grateful for a good cookie and perhaps some fresh ice cream to look forward to.  Grateful to know that we'll have insurance for another year, though at a bit of a higher rate and a bit less coverage.  (Still haven't received the hospital bill for the nuclear stress/rest test back in July. Sheesh.) Am grateful we found someone great to cut The Husband's hair.  And grateful for sweaters, socks and soup. 

Drained

And I have no pictures.  

Spent over an hour trying to get an appointment.  Everything is online only.  No appointment for three weeks which surprises me.  Am trying to decide if it's worth a phone call to see if by some small miracle something is available sooner.  Not sure I have the oomph.

Received a text.  From our lawn mower.   Made me so sad.  Made my stomach upset.  Apparently I was out of line telling him that once the sprinkler guy turns off the water to the grass for the season then there's no longer a need for mowing.  At least that was my take on things, figured the grass wouldn't really grow without regular watering.  Got quite the lecture - among other things about how I cut him off too early and mowing lawns is his livelihood.  Still don't know what to think about it.  We haven't ever had mowers before, haven't had a need, The Husband has always done all of the yard work, so this is kind of new territory to me.  Apparently I wasn't supportive of how he "does business".  Didn't ask, didn't know I needed to, he didn't say.  My reply was as pleasant as I could be.  But as the day has gone on I keep thinking:  doesn't he work for us?  Since I'm the "employer"  don't I have a say?  Sigh.

Then it was off to the dealership for the 30,000 mile service on the car.  I almost wish we hadn't gone.  $650 - for a nine year old car that really only has 28,000 miles on it. Feels like $650 down the drain.  Came away with instructions to save for rear brakes and new tires, they're both in the marginal category.  License renewal (again, online which for once was kinda-sorta-maybe-not-really convenient) another $175.  How do people live in this world with everything so expensive? 

And I'm feeling crummy.  Didn't take my omeprazole this morning, trying to not have it very often.  Shared a twisted churro at Costco (walked around the store while waiting for the car) so it was some sugar, then sipped The Husband's diet dr. pepper which I shouldn't have.  The caffeine just makes my stomach so miserable.  I'm all shaky, feeling broke and discouraged. 

On the bright side:  the car is set for another year.  (Next big mileage service on it is at 60K miles and costs - currently - about $850. At our current rate of roughly 3,000 miles / year that could be another 9 or ten years.  Who knows what'll happen, where we'll be when we are 84 years old.)  I can find another lawn mower if I want, though likely not for as cheap as he is.  I can try taking my omeprazole tomorrow and see if that helps me feel better, and sleep with the window closed so I don't wake up completely congested and unable to breathe.  And I can wait for three weeks for that appointment.  It isn't dire.  Just me trying to find someone better to help me out with something.  So, it could all be so way worse.  Read this the other day:  "don't forget the imagine the best case scenario, too."  Good thought for me.  

Tomorrow will definitely be better.  💛

Another Week Almost Finished

Friday again.  Sometimes the weeks seem to fly by and other times it feels like I'm just trying to walk through deep, deep thick mud.

Am I awful for skipping second hour of church on the rare occasion when I "just can't"?  Did it last Sunday, haven't felt a bit of remorse.  Would be mildly interested in hearing how it went, but only mildly.

Took dinner to our friend on her cancer treatment day. A new scan revealed reduction in size of tumors, some even went away completely.  WooHoo!!  I've got to figure out a way to make taking her weekly meals more affordable for me.  Also ran a birthday gift to a loved one with a birthday tomorrow.  This is a busy time - three important birthdays to remember this week alone.

Went with our friends for a bit of a road trip yesterday.  Drove through Wyoming and then down to Mirror Lake, took the more direct route home.  Such a delightful day.  We took sandwiches and had a quick picnic lunch before strolling the trail that circles the lake.  The weather was absolutely perfect.  The lake beautiful, it was just literally sparkling in the sunshine.  Not lots of people up there - though we did watch a man land the fish he caught.  Ate silly snack food all day long.  Then had leftovers for dinner at home, so not lots of work for me preparing.  A day to remember.  Good times. If they invite us again next year, it will be 3 years in a row.  Does that mean we're part of their tradition?  I hope so.  

My fellow organist brought me back a couple gifts from his trip to Japan.  This cute little doll and a very fun plant - succulents inside a pumpkin
gourd.  I asked him what happens if I kill it.  He was quick to say just toss it.  The instructions say it only is meant to last about 4-6 weeks anyway so I can rest assured that no matter what happens it's just fine. Never had a plant like this, I love the seasonal things that bring beauty.  I confess that most of the autumn colors aren't my favorite.  (i.e. orange, brown)

Had a texting conversation with someone.  Wished I had come across this article before the texting.  Might have been good to share with him.  Still, I'm glad that I found it anyway.  Reverse Bucket List I really like the thoughts expressed here.

Two good friends

I finally finished up the embroidery project I've been working on.  The last two evenings have found me immersed in my neglected-for-many-months cross stitch.  Am reminded when I pick it up again how much I love it.  

The guy is here tuning the piano -didn't need too much work, I don't think, it seems to have held the pitch and tuning pretty well, but then that seems to always be the case for me.  Next week it'll be the annual service on the car.  I'm pretty sure it'll mean new tires all around.  Sigh.  It feels like there's no end to the outgo of $$$ from our small funds. 

Today I'm struggling a bit to truly feel the gratitude that I want to feel.  I don't want to just be surface in any area of my life.  

I'm grateful for kind souls who will take the time to listen to me and help me feel valued.  Am grateful for the lovely piano that elevates my meager abilities.  Am grateful for this beautiful season - the yellow of the aspens makes my heart happier - and the easing of the oppressive heat makes my body feel better.  I'm grateful for something good to read, something good to eat, somewhere comfortable to live  - those aren't just flippantly listed small things, they are all very important things to me.  

Wish I Had A Picture -

 - of the sweet hug we saw a woman give her horse this morning.  We often walk that route and The Husband always greets all the horses there, there's about 4 in that particular area.  This morning The Husband greeted not only the horses, but the woman also.  She came over for a bit of a chat.  The horse is named Caesar - great, great grandson of Secretariat, so good bloodlines. Caesar was also a racehorse.  Anyway, we learned about her horse and a bit about herself.  She said this horse saved her, almost teared up (which made me struggle with the same tearing up). I told her I wish I'd had a picture of the way she hugged him and patted him and stroked him.  The look on her face was pure love.  😢

Last night we attended a benefit concert downtown SLC.  We didn't go for the "benefit" (fundraising) part, but for the music.  Live music is always very fun and my hope was that The Husband would really enjoy it.  (We truly need more "out of the box" non-routine activities, it's good for him.) I think he did.  I did, very much so.  Want to always remember this little tiny portion.  The singer has an 18 month old son.  Says he sings to him every night, while the little guy holds his Kermit the Frog, "The Rainbow Connection".  Sang it for us last night, after mentioning that he's never sung this song in public before and we were all captivated.  His eyes were closed as he finished off the song and you could just see him thinking of his precious son, was feeling all the feels.  I wondered how many of the audience noticed (as I did) the unobtrusive quick swipe of a single tear off his cheekbone.  He jumped immediately into a very upbeat and energetic song; in my opinion, though, "The Rainbow Connection" was truly the highlight. Very tender.

Were making our way down the baking aisle at the grocery.  I reached over and nabbed two bags (they're smaller now, remember?) of chocolate chips and heard a loud "load it up" from behind me.  Curious, I looked around and an older guy caught my eye and said, "that's not near enough".  Ha ha ha. We fellow chocolate chip lovers recognize each other.  Completely removed any guilt I might have felt about buying those chocolate chips and was even mildly tempted to grab another bag.

I've very often, throughout my life, felt pretty invisible.  More so since entering "old" age.  I've had the thought a couple times that perhaps the reason people talk to me  (like the horse woman this morning, the chocolate chip guy yesterday - it still happens often enough that I notice, especially since I'm not usually initiating conversation with anyone)  wherever I am is Heavenly Father's way of letting me know I'm not quite completely invisible.  Is that possible? 

Today I'm so grateful for the stars in the morning.  Our walks begin in darkness, it feeds my soul to watch the day arrive.  I'm grateful for benches along the way of our walks for The Husband to have a bit of a rest.  I'm grateful that we were able to attend the concert last night - tickets were buy one and get the second half off, another reason to be grateful, made it easier to justify that luxury.  I'm grateful for the kindness of strangers, and that someone feels comfortable enough around me (sometimes a complete stranger)  speak freely.  And I'm so grateful for my loved ones.  I might wish that things were better between us, but at least no one seems to actively dislike us and I consider that a blessing.  I'm grateful that we celebrated our 56th anniversary.  No one else I would rather journey through this life than The Husband.  I'm so grateful he's tolerant of my innumerable flaws and instead notices my (so far unfulfilled) potential.  💖