Day for Breaking Things

 So, right after my last post whining about the price of eggs, I watched some news.  About Ukraine.  And was brought up short by my selfishness.  My heart has been so filled with worry and concern about those poor people - involved in a war they had no say in.  And I'm complaining about egg prices.  I still have so much to learn.

I got up yesterday morning (after a night bouncing between two different recliners and the bed because of the pain in my arm) determined to have a good day, to do some good, and be unselfish.  That resolve was shattered within just a little while.  It often feels like no matter what I do that nasty adversary has me square in his sights, just waiting to get to me.

I phoned our friend who was on the schedule for the organ at church.  She's in her 80's and has some bad joints (think it's knees but might be hips, I just don't know) and with the tremendous amount of snow we've been having I was concerned about her getting to church safely.  Offered to play the organ for her.  She reassured me she was just fine.  Only to call about 20 minutes later, just as we were leaving for church, to say that they were completely blocked in and there was no way she was going anywhere.  

(On a side note, The Husband spent quite some time snow blowing, was nearly finished when the street plow came down and pushed all that heavy mess up into the driveway entrance.  It took him roughly 45 minutes to shovel (it was too compacted and hard to use the blower) it out, in some points it was nearly up to his hips.  Good thing no one needed to go anywhere really fast.  And more snow is coming they say.  Hopefully the street plow driver will be more careful this time around.)

A fair amount of snow.

Got to church and was met with the decision to do an extra song -  congregational hymn, since next Sunday is Fast Sunday.  Ran through it once and said sure, I can manage. Even though it's one of my least favorite hymns to play even on the piano. Then I proceeded to completely mess it up during the singing.  I was so embarrassed.  People never admit to noticing my mistakes.  But this was completely out there. 

After being unkind and unpleasant to my loved ones, decided to try to isolate myself for a little while to calm down.  Heard a crash.  25+ years ago I bought a set of decorative Charles Wysocki plates that have hung on the wall in our bathroom.  They should never have been put there, it's a narrow space.  One of the plates was bumped years ago, but we patched it up and ignored it.  Last month one was knocked off the wall and broken in pieces.  Yesterday was the second casualty.  All the remaining plates are off the wall and will be donated.  I feel so foolish for putting them in a place I knew was risky.  They're just dumb plates and people don't use them to decorate anymore.  

They're all off the wall now.

Then I broke a little bracket on the rack in the dishwasher.  The Husband likes to use them for keeping my little goblets in place, they're kind of fragile.  

We've had so much snow over the last couple days that our trees are bending way over from the weight of it.  It's heavy, wet, dense snow.  Our trees are precious. (I'm thinking at some point the neighbors might be sorry they took all of theirs out, our environment needs trees more than it needs concrete.)  So at ten last night The Husband was out trying to shake some snow off the trees so they wouldn't break. The honeylocusts never lost all their leaves.   The pole being used for shaking those trees broke off a bit of metal from the end.  Was found this morning by the snow blower. All crumpled.  

So my efforts to be kind and good felt thwarted.  By my own behavior.  I was ready to cry all day long. And, again, not from happiness, from discouragement.  I dislike when I'm even partially succumbing to that nasty adversary who only wants to destroy the world. 

This morning I am so very grateful for a new day, a chance to start afresh once more.  I'm grateful that we got a decent snowblower, it has definitely proven worth it the last little while.  Back flare-ups are hopefully reduced when The Husband doesn't have to shovel so much.  I'm grateful that I made a big pot of chicken noodle soup yesterday, and had enough to share with someone who probably hasn't had a home-cooked meal like that since his wife died about a year and a half ago.  I'm grateful to have seen the dr. and will be getting an MRI scheduled to find out what's going on with my arm. And grateful as always, for prayer.  I'm praying especially for my loved ones. We all have need of help from above.