This Is A Do-Over

So I drafted some thoughts previously.  Left them for a couple days and now I'm back, starting fresh.  Trying hard to be chipper.  I thought if I always said I was dandy or great when someone asked how I was feeling that saying it would somehow subliminally influence me to feel that way.  Not calling that perspective (or hope) a success so far.

Anyway, here I am trying again.

I had some mental questions:  • Why do people persist in running stop signs and red lights?  Does their life (and the lives of those around them) mean so little to take such risk? • Why is it so much cheaper to buy a frozen lasagne than make one from scratch?  (And I'm here to say the homemade is far superior than frozen, so perhaps that's the overriding factor.) • Why can't all cans nest, for stacking, like the tuna ones generally do?  Life would be so much better with such a small change.  And here I'm speaking from over a year's experience of stacking cans every week at the Bishop's Storehouse.  Nesting cans:  huge improvement. • When a person says at the end of every conversation/text/message: "you're the best", what does that really mean?  I'm coming to believe that it means basically nothing.  I'd rather hear "talk to you soon" or some other generalization.  You're the best?  Best of what?  In whose judgement?  And why does there have to be a best - does that mean the next person that isn't a recipient of that phrase is the worst?  Why does it always have to be a competition? 

Went out for a brief Sunday afternoon stroll, opened the front door and there on the doorstep was a box of cookies.  I don't think I've ever seen cookies like this.  The presentation (cookie wreath) was just lovely, and so creative.  It's a good thing I'm not a fan of sugar cookies.  Then, last night, the doorbell rang. It was a family from the ward - I'd spent a bit of time a few weeks ago trying to help her re-create a crochet stitch.  I felt like a failure when I left her house because I didn't help one iota.  But here she was, on the doorstep with homemade sugar cookie bars to say thank you.  

Our amaryllis is doing well. It apparently likes where it is. I'm looking forward to seeing it bloom.  It's astonishing to me that you can encase a bulb in wax and not have to water or attend it in any way and it turns into beautiful flowers.

And I'm working hard again today to find some peace and encouragement for my soul.  I was disappointed on Sunday, someone took a responsibility from me - one that I willingly do my best to accomplish and work hard at not neglecting (for probably over a decade now) - she basically told me to shove off. I'm still mentally fussing over it and trying not to. It probably really doesn't matter overall, I just hate that people think I'm not doing something right or not doing it at all.  I want to say I've always been pretty conscientious. It wasn't her place anyway.  I've got to let it go.

I will say I'm grateful for prayer.  I think there's been only few minutes over the last week that I haven't been in "prayer mode".  Heavenly help is always in need.  I'll be looking for it all day.  💗 I'm also grateful that we were able to find someone that could use our old Christmas tree.  I hated to throw it away if it could be of value to someone else.