Final Friday of 2016

And I'm hoping that 2017 will bring some joy and contentment and...more fun.  We haven't had enough yet.

So I've been reading some articles.  Lots of thoughts going through my head.  Boyd C. Matheson wrote an article for our local newspaper (do we still call them newspapers when we read them online?  If not, then what do we call them--newsoutlet?  That sounds so cumbersome.)  If I remember right it was titled sacred idleness.  He says we need time to regroup, to absorb and refresh our spiritual selves in order to be more effective and happy at service.  At least that's what I took from the article.  I particularly liked this sentence: "It is true that more people run out of energy and hope than run out of opportunity."  I never ever want to run out of hope.  I think that is the universal motivator - if I have no hope, then what is the point of anything?

Beauty even in the cold and fog.

And another article I read was by a woman who has a hard time completing much of anything. She has good intentions but life gets away from her and she has difficulty finishing.  Her "life coach" told her that she shouldn't wait to do stuff until she can get it perfect. "Perfect is the enemy of done."  I've always heard it said that perfect is the enemy of good. Are good and done the same thing?  Not really. But in the context of tasks that need doing and prioritization that gets all muddled up, I like that thought.  It doesn't have to be perfect, just needs doing.  What a weight off our souls when stuff is done, whether it's perfectly done or not.  (I've long had a love-hate relationship with that word (perfect) and its concept. )  I remember years ago reading a little self help book where they said the same thing - do something well enough to get it done (when absolute perfection isn't really necessary) and move on, guilt free.  Funny that that thought has stuck with me for several decades. I like that it's resurfacing.

January will be my month in the rotation to play the organ in Sacrament meeting and the piano in Relief Society.  No more teaching Sunday School.  I'm feeling much less weighed down, though I have to wonder if Heavenly Father is disappointed in me because I gave up the teaching?  I'm fairly certain I wouldn't have if I'd had someone to teach with and didn't have to do it every week, it really burned me out.  And that's a discouragement that can spill over into other of life's areas.

It's been cold.  And while we're still technically December, I feel like we're fully into our usual January inversion.  Though the news said our morning air was filled with fog (and it didn't smell quite as bad as yesterday morning) there's still some definite smog/haze in the air.  My walk in 13 degrees was quiet, I got some good praying in and some thoughtful solitude that always fills me. The best part? The Husband walked out and met me just a bit from home and we strolled the last little bit together, watching the birds and chatting.  That's my very favorite activity - walking with those I love.

How grateful I am to have a bit of love in my life.  My childhood was quite lacking in that arena. I'm so aware (and thankful)  that I am the recipient of more love now and I need to work harder at showing that love to others.  I'm grateful for warm coats and earmuffs and gloves and hats.

Paperwhites

I love flowers.  And I especially love flowers in the house in winter, though I really dislike spending money on cut flowers, they are gone so quick it seems like such a waste of money.

I've got a bloom stem that's doing well on one of the orchids that hopefully will turn into flowers.

But, for Christmas I was given a pot with three paperwhite bulbs and planting medium.  The bulbs have already sprouted a bit so I got them potted as quick as I could.  It'll be lovely to see them bloom...if they do.  Heavenly Father was generous with beauty in this world.

Feeling Odd

Morning after Christmas

And I totally know I've posted about feeling a bit odd before - kind of out of synch.  Is that my new normal?  :^]

So we had a nice Christmas.  We got to see the local grandchildren, except for the one that's with his parents at her folks' place in CA.  I'm glad they got to be with her family.  But it was a weird day. Church in the morning, and it wouldn't be church at Christmastime without music.  We woke up to snow and more snow.  The Husband was over at the church helping to clear the walks (thankfully they hire out the parking lot and it was done pretty well) at 5 a.m.   He shoveled and plowed our driveway several times throughout the day.  I think the grand total was over a foot of fresh snow. And very cold.

Cute new socks!

After church we opened gifts and enjoyed lots of treats, including a new-to-me recipe (croissants stuffed with sauteed mushrooms, fresh spinach and gruyere cheese, topped with an egg/milk mixture and baked) that may or may not be repeated.  It was ok, tasted good, but not as fabulous as I'd hoped.

A few of the birdies.

I think everyone was pretty happy with their gifts.  I wish it weren't so expensive to mail things to the out of state children.  I'm determined to do better at their Christmas next year.  Where can I buy some of the creativity that is so prevalent in others?

We didn't even have a Christmas dinner, didn't eat any dinner at all, really.  So it was a bit strange, but peaceful and that's the very best part for me.

It's really pretty in the sunlight, with the birds chattering.

The birdies are loving the feeders, especially with all the snow.  I tried multiple times to capture the sheer numbers of juncos and finches, but didn't have the patience to stand out there in the cold.  The Husband was smarter than me, he just took pictures from me through the window.

I received some great new Stance socks.  Didn't even know about this brand until lately, what a luxurious gift - high end socks.  And some new earmuffs that will stay on my ears that I'm anxious to try out now that the trail has been cleared of most of the snow.

I relaxed quite a bit yesterday and am ready to dive in to packing up Christmas.  I hardly put anything out this year, a few nativities, the tree and the stockings.  I like less and less fuss as I age.  Simple is wonderful.

I'm so grateful for a sense of peace and contentment.  For texts and emails from loved ones.  For good health (knocking on wood).  For receiving thoughtful gifts.  For my treadmill when the trail is slick. And for the beauties of nature, no matter the season.

Eric Barker

 I continue to enjoy his articles.  Not that I agree with everything he says, but I agree with more of his theories than those parts I disagree with.  I often wonder if he is religious?  I think he'd make a great Latter Day Saint Mormon.

Enjoy this article, take from it what works for you, incorporate his helpful suggestions that fit your life -- or not.  At the very least there is food for thought here.

4 Rituals

I love knowing that I can be mentally stronger.

Still Learning Stuff

Sunrise, looking west, it was so beautiful.

After my six+ decades, I'm still learning stuff about life and people and how to - well - pretty much how to everything.

The pictures are from yesterday.  It had been several days since I'd been able to be out for my walk. It does so much for my soul!  And I was determined to get out.  The trails hadn't been plowed and were icy in the cold, that bumpy-partially-melted then-refrozen-surface that was a teensy bit treacherous.  But venture out I did.  And I loved it.  (Though my foot didn't, even though I went really slow and careful.)

Icy, slick trail.

The sunrise was lovely.  The sun on that little stretch of trail shows the ice reflection.  And the sunset was absolutely spectacular.  (I'm a real fan of the understatement, but in this case superlatives work best.  It really was amazingly beautiful.  Even the weather guys on the nightly news were showing pictures that people had sent in, so I wasn't the only one making multiple trips out to the front porch to witness nature's beauty.)

So, I was at the grocery the other day, playing leapfrog with a woman throughout the store.  We arrived at roughly the same time, left at roughly the same time.  And I was intimidated.  We were dressed similarly - warm shirt, warm hooded vest, jeans, shoes, purses.  My vest is an old comfy one from LLBean.  Hers? Name brand with real fur around the hood's edge. My jeans? from Kohl's, I like the way they fit my frumpy shape.  Hers? Expensive. Obviously so.  My shoes are the Sanita clogs (years old and bought at a discount store) that I'm wearing pretty much every day to help support my complaining foot.  Hers? Designer boots.  My purse is a bag I treated myself to from the outlet, fairly cheap in the overall scheme of things (I really, really dislike spending money.) Hers? One of those multiple hundreds of dollars a bag name brand. And every time our carts passed she left behind a cloud of expensive perfume. I don't wear perfume, the Husband doesn't care for it, he's sensitive to smells like that.

Stunning Sunset, looking west from our front porch.

It was hard not to feel "less than" when she passed.  I smiled when our eyes met, she barely lifted a corner of her mouth, and I felt instantly dismissed.

I have to keep reminding myself, even at this age, that all that stuff doesn't matter. And I shouldn't judge that that's the way she prefers to spend her money. It doesn't matter whether our stuff comes from Nordstrom's or Target, the Dollar Store or a Thrift store.

The bottom line is we're probably both really nice people.  At least I try to be and hope for that.  I guess what sorta got to me was the sense that I was inferior, a simple smile in return would have been nice. And I hope I've learned the lesson here: that it doesn't matter what I am on the outside, it's what I am on the inside, how I recognize and respect others.

In contrast, on my walk yesterday morning, there was a crew of city employees going around the park with buckets of ice melt they were dispersing on trouble spots to keep people like me from falling. They were dressed for the weather, knit caps, workboots, heavy work coats.  I could see a couple tattoos peeking out from under their sleeves and long, long hair beneath their caps. And without fail, each one I passed gave me a smile and a pleasant good morning, the biggest smile from the skinny one with the shabbiest coat and the longest hair. I should never judge.  I should always be kind.  I should give every soul the recognition they deserve - simply as a child of our Heavenly Father.  Yeah, I"m working on that.

I'm grateful for smiles that indicate a contentment and happiness in life.

I Took A Brief Vacation...

Lovely Friday morning.

From posting my thoughts here.  There wasn't any particular reason, I just didn't.  But here I am with some post-weekend thinking.

Friday morning the skies were blue and the air clear and it was lovely.  Just a few hours later the temperature had dropped 15 degrees in about as many minutes, the wind was howling around the house, blowing rain then rain and snow mixed and then just straight snow.  I helped (probably more like hindered) The Husband while he took the mowing deck off the John Deere, replacing it with the snowplow blade which he promptly put to use.  There was no way we could have shoveled that super wet heavy snow.  And we were glad we got it up before the night came and the temps were down in the single digits, made snow removal the next morning so much easier!

Friday, a few hours later.

We're pretty much ready for Christmas. We've spent all our Christmas money and hope that the recipients recognize their small gifts as tokens of our love for them. As I age, I more and more dislike the pressure that accompanies Christmas.

My Dec. calendar page, I am on the lookout.

We didn't go to a movie on Saturday, opted instead to take life a little slower.  I dragged The Husband on a quest for wild bird seed. He's always loved birds.  And we've fed them lots over the years.  But a couple years ago it just felt like we were spending huge amounts of money on the little flitterers. So we kind of just quit.  I decided that that would be a small gift for him that he would really enjoy.  And to our delight our local IFA carries bird seed and suet for what seems like a reasonable price.  So we lugged some home.  Since it was nearly dark when we filled the feeders we were anxious to see what the morning brought in the way of bird-friends.  How fun to see them out as soon as the sun came up:  chickadees, juncos, finches, doves, scrubjays, and even a couple flickers that we had to chase off because they wanted to drill holes in our fresh stucco.  The quail seem to always be around so they're not new, but it has been great to see The Husband's delight in the return of the birds.

Yesterday was my last Sunday School lesson.  I've turned the manual over to the next teacher (there'll be no class next Sunday since it's Christmas). And I feel quite...adrift. Don't feel so "finished" as I expected to.  Was told that I'd be missed as a teacher which came as a bit of a surprise thought. People are so very kind.  I'm pretty sure there won't be a replacement calling, but I'll still be taking my rotation on the organ and piano bench so I won't be completely put out to pasture.  I'm looking forward to a lessening of anxiety throughout the week without having a lesson to prepare and give. I'm not really comfortable in front of people.

And finally, today was dental check-up day.  I dread these appointments.  With a passion (if dread can be considered passionate).  Came away cavity free!  YAY for me!  The bad news?  He says the day has arrived - it's time to replace that cracked crown of mine.  (It's been cracked for years, but now it's totally cracked through and he's afraid that I'll bite down on something and it will just fall apart.) Can't say I wasn't warned, but I've put it off for as long as I can. And truly, I'm not really surprised, I kind of expected him to say the time has come.  So, after Christmas I'll be back in that chair being worked on, trying to keep my tongue out of the way.

Today I'm grateful for the bird-friends that make The Husband happy. I'm grateful for people who say they've enjoyed our Sunday School class, but also grateful that that particular anxiety will be over for a while. I'm grateful for beautiful sunshine that feels so good on my face.  For good dental check-ups and for dental insurance. And for deep, deep breaths - filling my lungs, relaxing me, reminding me to be grateful for these wonderful bodies Heavenly Father blessed us with.

Thought Muddle

Let's see if I can find some sense of coherency.

• I'm still thinking about a couple of women I saw at Kohl's the other day.  The one woman has some disability, she was using a wheelchair in the store, the other woman was clearly helping her out with some Christmas shopping.  Based on their conversation (I admit it - I was eavesdropping) it seemed like they weren't particularly close friends.  The first woman was expressing gratitude for the helper's patience and kindness.  I had to wonder if the one was doing some service based on the "Light The World" program of the Church.  It was nice to witness (even if they did leave the wheelchair in the middle of the entrance to the checkout counter), was glad to see quiet service.

• Which reminds me of someone I know.  At the beginning of this month people were posting all over about their acts of service.  One person asked, "What have you done for your service?"  And I was so delighted with the response of another, "It's a secret." That, in my own opinion is the real benefit of service - to do such things to glorify our Heavenly Father, to give Him credit for all good in the world.  When we put the focus on ourselves, or brag about ourselves and our own offerings, somehow for me the bright light of good is dimmed a bit.  I so love that people go about being unselfish and keeping it quiet.

• Came across this saying the other day.  If that's the case I should be really really wise.  Ha ha ha.  Not quite.  But still, it's a cute saying.

"I do not have gray hair, I have wisdom highlights."

• And yes, that's a picture of my feet.  In socks.  No shoes!!  Admittedly I'm wearing two pair of socks (for the extra bit of cushioning) and my compression anklet for my aching ankle (I don't think it has ever fully recovered from that awful sprain a couple summers ago and sometimes I wonder if the weather patterns exacerbate the dull ache) but I'm trying a day inside the house with no shoes.  I'm a sock person in the house, dislike shoes and yesterday I'd reached my absolute limit with them. They've been a wonderful help, and I'm thrilled to have shoes that reduce the pain in my feet.  But today I'm feeling lighter in my step, by far, without them.  I'm walking carefully, and slowly, but so far, so good.  It'll be nice to be all healed.

• Came across this article this morning and loved it.  She's one columnist I try to never miss, she's always got some good thoughts.  I'll bet she's a wonderful mom.  I hope my kids all understand that I tried.  I know I wasn't the best and there are lots of regrets, but I did try to do my best.

Remember

I'm grateful today for feet that are feeling well enough to go shoe-less in the house.  For dinner with friends (courtesy of The Husband's Christmas bonus from his employer) to look forward to.  For a treadmill to help me with my morning walk when I daren't go outside for fear I'll slip. For those who are good examples to me. And for hope. I always need hope.

Strange Weekend

And I'm beginning to wonder if all our future weekends will be strange.  It's been some time since we saw a movie, and some time since we've seen a movie I've liked.  I'm a tad tired of science fiction / fantasy. Maybe I'll just load up the TIVO with Hallmark movies and call it good.  (Yes, I'm that old and sappy.)

Since we haven't had any movies to see on Saturdays we've kind of been at loose ends.  We've ended up running errands.  Wow, isn't that fun? Well, actually it pretty much is fun when we're together.  But not quite the fun we've had in mind.  We're mostly done with Christmas shopping.  And I've been mentally done with spending money for a while, though I still seem to be doing a fair amount of that.

Saturday we decided to get a new battery for the John Deere (lawn mower / snow pusher).  The Husband has had quite a time the last few years with it stopping at inconvenient times requiring subsequent human muscle power for pushing the tractor back into the shop-garage. The thing is 15 years old, so it probably really needs to be replaced, but neither one of us is anxious to do that until we absolutely have to.  (Along with my washer and dryer, my Prius, and the refrigerator.)

7 a.m. looking east

Battery buying is tricky.  There's the recycling thing (so you don't just toss it in to the trash to contaminate the landfill) which includes a refundable "core charge" to make sure you bring in the old one.  After standing in line at Home Depot's help desk, being directed to a register, being re-directed to the help desk and then finally pointed toward the returns desk, we thought maybe we had a chance of getting out to the car in a reasonable amount of time.  Does 15-20 more minutes constitute "reasonable amount of time"?  (And that particular segment of our buying experience required 3 people.)

After stopping for a sandwich we arrived home to discover (wait for it):  it was the wrong battery. So back went The Husband to exchange it.  This time he was armed with experience from our earlier visit and it took a fraction of the time.  So far the John Deere is running just fine (our fingers are crossed).

My foot seems a bit better, wearing my Dansko shoes every day all day has helped.  They're a more rigid shoe that seems to act like a boot but is way more comfortable.  It's hard to be diligent about this when I'm way happier in stocking feet inside.  I really dislike wearing shoes in the house, but I'm determined to conquer the foot issue.  I'm trying to drink more milk to help my bones; I have a sense that more natural kinds of calcium are better for me than the supplements.

This morning's walk was wonderful.  Once again I had the trail to myself.  I walked a bit farther and turned the iPod to an all-Christmas-music station and loved being out.  The picture doesn't do the park justice, for some reason the lights don't photograph well on my phone camera.  But it was a lovely morning and a lovely walk. (And yeah, after completing this and looking at that picture, it's pretty much an embarrassment.)

I'm grateful for good shoes for my cantankerous feet.  For special glass that enable me to better see the music at the piano.  For thoughtful invitations to dinner (loved seeing those grandchildren), for quiet drives with The Husband and for morning walks that feed my soul.

Favorite French Fries

So the Freddy's Steak Burger and Frozen Custard finally opened.

The good news:  It's just up the hill, maybe a five minute drive from our house.

The bad news:  It's just up the hill, maybe a five minute drive from our house.

We ran up last night to give it a try.  We've only been to a Freddy's once, and that was just for a quick taste of their frozen custard.  Last night we gave it the full test.  Burger, Philly steak sandwich, fries, soda for The Husband (his weakness is Diet Pepsi and they have Pepsi and not Coke) and of course, the frozen custard.

YUM!

Verdict:  We'll be back.  The Husband's Philly sandwich was cold.  I mean cold.  The sprinkled cheese had no hope of melting.  Ever.  But they re-did the sandwich, no problem with the final result much improved.  The Husband liked it.  I liked the simplicity of my burger:  mustard and pickle. That's just the way I prefer my burgers:  simple.

And the french fries?  My new favorite.  Really.  They're shoestring size, so little.  And while that means they cool off fairly quick, they don't get soggy.  They're crisp and yummy and I ate most of The Husband's (I never order them, try to be strong but generally succumb to the salty goodness) including the second batch that he received along with his sandwich re-do.

The bad news part?  I could eat ice cream/frozen custard 3 times a day and never get tired of it.  So having them 5 minutes away will surely be a difficult temptation to resist.  The prices at Freddy's are decent for a simple scoop and the chocolate is a good chocolate flavor, rich without tasting fake, if that makes any sense.

Dinner of fries and frozen custard?  Of course, couldn't be healthier!  :^)

Today I'm grateful for a decent haircut, for treats of chocolate squares, for a warm comforter on our bed, for moisture leaking from the clouds and for only 2 more Sunday School anxiety filled lessons to direct.  I fully intend to take some deep deep breaths.  The study has been fabulous for me.  The anxiety, less so.  It was a good learning experience.

Sometimes My Life Is Odd

And I know that I'm a fairly independent thinker, am generally quite reluctant to follow the crowd. Still, you'd think I'd "fit in" better than I do.

Was at Target.  Wanted to make a purchase.  It rang up regular price.  The sign on the rack said 40% off.  When questioned, the employee said, oh that's 40% off when you use the Cartwheel app on your phone.  Mentally I'm saying, oh crap - the world doesn't revolve around our phones quite yet.  Or does it?  Out loud I said, oh, I don't have that app.  She did her best to convince me it's easy to install (of course it is) and they don't send any info or anything like that, it's just coupons. Yeah, I'm sure.

So, I paid full price and am grumpy about it.  I don't want ten million apps on my phone.  (Don'tcha know your phone is meant to be lived on, accessed every single second of your life, saves you tons of money?) I guess that means I'm mentally old. I try to be current on stuff.  But seriously, is there no limit?

Love those clouds.

(And I try really hard to be positive here with my thoughts.  But sometimes a woman just has to have her say!)

And speaking of phones, I made another stop.  To purchase something.  I walked in, stood there.  And stood there.  And stood there.  Finally I pulled my phone from my pocket and called the number of the establishment.  Sure enough, the manager came hotfooting it over.  I told him it was me calling, that I figured that way they'd see I could use some help.  He apologized.  And was kind.  I think it's kind of funny.  And actually am a teensy mite pleased at myself for figuring out how to get some help without shouting out loud to the whole world that I needed it.

And the skies / clouds this morning?  Yes, absolutely beautiful.  The best part is I've had the trail almost completely to myself the last few mornings.  And it is fabulous.

Today I'm grateful that I've got some Christmas wrapping done.  That I can stay home all day tomorrow and work on my lesson.  That dinner is in the crockpot (my favorite kind of meal).  That I have a phone I can carry with me everywhere.  And I'm grateful that Christmas (at least that gifting thing that is becoming such a challenge for me) will soon arrive.  Hopefully the recipients of our fussing and worrying will be pleased.

Tuesday and I'm Pedaling As Fast As I Can

This morning's view to the east.

How are we so busy at this time of our lives?

• I'm so enjoying the new window in the bathroom.  The replacement was installed last Friday and it's nice to be able to see clearly the view unobstructed by the condensation between the panes of glass.  Yes, it's a blessing to be able to take care of our surroundings.

• So Saturday, 5:00 pm, I received a call from a sister in the ward.  She had been asked to sing (with her sister) in R. S. the next day.  At the last minute, the song had been changed and her previously invited accompanist had begged off, she needed more time to practice.  Would I consider playing for her?  She has two versions of the accompaniment, one harder than the other.  Sure, I said, I'll give it a shot.  It's been a number of years since I played "O Holy Night" but I think I can manage.  After picking up the music and choosing the version to play I spent a half hour or so practicing on my own before heading over to her home for a rehearsal.

And the view to the west--clear across the valley..

And came home discouraged.  This woman has always intimidated me.  I have a very small fraction of the music training that she's had.  I overshadow her in experience, but that's only by virtue of my age. But the thing I do have is a willing heart.

So I spent an hour or so practicing that evening and then as much time as I could manage Sunday morning before church.

How did it go? Well...ok.  I made a few mistakes, but tried to not stumble with them. The tricky parts that had been a concern were better than expected.  Whenever I play in public I always always pray for angels to guide my fingers to the right keys so as to help me do my best.  I always want to bring the Spirit.

I must have passed the "audition" well enough.  This sister is singing the same song (solo) in Sacrament meeting on Christmas morning.  She asked if I'd play for her then.  So apparently my efforts made her comfortable enough to invite me back.  That's a good thing.  I'll work on not being so intimidated in the meantime.

Now I'm off to the grocery for some supplies.  I've got a full day with laundry and lesson planning and interrupted vacuuming to complete.

And in the midst of that I'm practicing my gratitude.  For sufficient funds for food and shelter and Christmas.  And for a husband who happily works hard to provide those things.  For lunches out with good friends.  For knowledge of Heavenly Father's plan and the companionship of the Holy Ghost to guide my words and actions.  I hope to always listen to those promptings.  I'm grateful to be able to look forward to an evening out with some friends in the next week or so.  And for hope.  Always for hope.

A Wonderful Few Days

It all started with the Relief Society Christmas social Thursday evening.  I rarely attend these things, being the anti-social anti-social-skilled person that I am.  Surprisingly I enjoyed it.  The walk home in the crisp air was further balm to my soul.

Saturday morning was the Ward Christmas party - another event I try to avoid.  Really, I'm lacking in the social graces that help lubricate personal interaction.  But, it was lovely.  The planners(and those who executed those plans) did a wonderful job without going overboard as is often the tendency.  The decorations were simple, the menu just right and the people kind.  Really, it was lovely.

Sunday's Fast and Testimony meeting was one of the best we've had in this year-old ward. My heart was touched.  I was the recipient of an unusually heart-warming prayer and hug from a class member in Sunday School and Relief Society was truly touching as a loved sister related her journey through a trial that was manageable because of the Atonement of Jesus Christ.

Fabulous Seats!

Right after Sacrament meeting, The Husband was given 6 tickets to the Christmas Devotional down at the Conference Center.  Wow - what a treasure. We took our daughter and grandson and the other two tickets went to a friend and her daughter.  We all sat together down on Row F - six rows from the podium.  It was simply awesome.  Truly.  Awesome.  The choir sang like angels. (We watch the broadcast every Sunday and I often remark that I wish they'd sing some softer, gentler songs - they seem to do much more of the large, big finish music.  Last night, the songs were all of the softer gentler delivery - again, warmth to my soul.) The talks were inspiring and touching.

Sunday was one of those rare days that fill your spirit.  The ones that seem to come along just when you really need them.  The ones that help you stand against the darker more challenging ones.  I so needed these last fews days.

And along the way we survived a trip to Costco in spite of the massive crowds, we have several more boxes of stuff to donate to Deseret Industries, bought a birthday gift, shared conversation with our favorite people from the ward we no longer belong to and generally tried to de-stress.  Frankly, I can't remember when a few days have left me so uplifted.

The downside is that I know at some point the difficulties/moods/challenges will creep in.  Hopefully I'll be armed with the strength to be steadfast against them.

I'm so grateful for the tender mercies that help us know our Heavenly Father is truly watching out for us - for His Hand that is evident in our lives.  I'm grateful for kindness, I need it so much from others, and am so grateful when it is so generously given.  I'm grateful for texts from loved ones.

Restless

I should be working on my Sunday School lesson.  And I was.  But I'm restless.  I'm rarely - if ever - bored.  But I do have times when I just don't want to do what I should be doing.  It makes me restless for something different.  Today's different:  staying home all day.  And therein probably is the problem.  I've had somewhere to go every day this week.  Was determined to stay at home today. And wouldn't you know?  I'm restless to go somewhere.

It's cold and wet way back there.

I've a growing stack of books from the library to be read - ones that have to be read in the original check-out period since they're new acquisitions that can't be renewed.  I've a teensy bit of Christmas wrapping that could be done. There's a Sunday School lesson to prepare/refine.  I've a note to write. Stitching to do and there's always vacuuming.  But I just plain don't want to do any of it.   So I'll sit here at my computer instead.

Pretty blue lights.

The last two mornings have found me out on the trail for my morning walk.  (There's no way on earth that what I do could be described as a workout.  But for me, well, it is what passes for exercise. Moving my body for an hour or so at a time is about as good as it gets for this 65 year old.)  The best thing about those walks has been the solitary nature of them.  Yesterday I only saw one person. Today, only 2 (a couple guys manly enough to brave the cold and dark to be out).  I loved being out there alone.

Not so blurry.

I narrowed today's camera work down to two shots - one of the misty clouds deep in the canyons over the mountain tops making it snow.  Yes, it looked cold.  A starkly beautiful cold.  The other is one of the lighted trees over in the park.  As I walked through the park one by one, the sensors (or timers, whatever it is) on the trees would trigger the lights to turn off.  This tree was the only one still glowing in that corner. I love love love the blue lights.  (And the red ones, and the green ones and the - well, you get the drift.) And I just now added a different picture of the same tree, one from nearly underneath because I guess I twitched - didn't realize that first picture was so blurry, maybe this one will be sharper.

I'm still whining about missing the newspaper.  And no, won't be subscribing again.  It's just that the iPad / computer isn't the same as reading the physical paper.  I've been reading it for decades, it'll take a long mourning period.

And in my reading this morning, this particular quote was in a columnist I really enjoy.  I wasn't quite so taken with another few sentences quoted by this person, but yes, I was reached by this one.

“The answer must be, I think, that beauty and grace are performed whether or not we will or sense them. The least we can do is try to be there.”

― Annie Dillard, Pilgrim at Tinker Creek

So today, I'm grateful for words that are powerful in our lives.  Especially ones like "thank you". Ones that convey attention to you and that you matter.  And particularly - I love you.  I'm grateful for lots of good stuff to read that doesn't require me to filter out profanity.  I'm grateful for the ability to choose what I want to do at any given moment.  For chocolate milk (for my bones, you know) and for grace, I love the concept.